Traditionally Speaking

Tradition means a handing down of ideas, beliefs or practices. Its a pattern or customary method or manner. And of course this time of year is full of family traditions starting on Thanksgiving and continuing until the holiday season spits you out into the new year.

The funny thing about traditions isn't how much they stay the same, but how they change over time.

Friends and family have a tradition of mapping out their plan of consumer attack for Black Friday. Some people camp out in front of stores two or three days beforehand to ensure their place in line for the best deals. But ask someone 15 years ago if they would stake-out Walmart for 72 hours and skip the family Thanksgiving dinner and you'd have been laughed at.

When I was young, immediate and extended family would gather at my grand parents' house for a pot luck meal. Those tastes and smells became ingrained in me to the degree that every Thanksgiving and Christmas my taste buds yearn for certain foods like Pavlov's dogs reaction to the ringing bell.

For Christmas, we'd repeat and gather again at my grand parents' house to open gifts and enjoy dinner.

But my traditions are in transition. Family members pass away. Parents get older. Children become adults. Relationships begin, evolve and some end. Time passes which inevitably means change.

Last week I celebrated Thanksgiving with my wife's family. It was a blend of new and old. For my wife's family Thanksgiving represented their 10th anniversary in the United States. They've adopted many traditions in the United States after arriving here from Colombia. For my sister-in-law's new husband from Mexico, it was his first time to celebrate the uniquely American holiday. For me, its special to watch this first generation family in the United States start their own traditions with blended cultures.

The tastes and smells are a little different. Don't get me wrong. There's still Turkey. But there is also pandabono and empanadas. There's a Spanish telanovela playing on the television. And table talk is in Spanish instead of English.

I suspect one of the reasons this time of year is stressful for people is because traditions change more than staying the same during a given year. And yet, we struggle to keep them the same.

For instance, its difficult in some cases, and down right impossible in others, for newlyweds to make both families happy during their first holiday season together. Do they visit with one family during Thanksgiving and the other during Christmas, then switch for the next year? Do they try to cram both into the same day? And if so, what if both families traditionally had a big dinner meal and now one needs to start doing a big lunch instead?

You know what I mean.

So, I find the notion of tradition to be somewhat of a funny thing for the first time in my life. My opinion about tradition has, as you may have guessed by now, changed.

A Political Note

My wife voted for a national election for the first time in the United States the other week after becoming a citizen nearly two years ago.

While we may not see eye to eye on all political issues, I'm proud she votes. Unlike some die hard Democrats or Republicans who would prefer the opposing party member have a flat tire and not be involved in an election, I encourage the marketplace of ideas and every citizens' right to vote.

Furthermore, each party has Biblical based platforms in moderation. That said, the fringes of each party's platform likewise conflicts with Biblical beliefs.

For example, Democrats often focus on social benefits for those less fortunate. That's Biblical. There are many scriptures that call people to take care of widows, orphans and the poor. That said, there's not a single scripture advocating laziness. So public policies that take care of the poor are good, but policies that encourage people to solely depend om the government aren't.

Republicans on the other hand encourage citizens to earn for themselves and be self-sufficient. That's Biblical also. The Bible teaches to store up for emergencies and discourages borrowing money. That said, Republicans are far from perfect. Capitalism left to its own devices can justify almost anything to generate more profit.

If you doubt, just consider the events of the past few years. Democrats acted as though home ownership was an entitlement instead of a privilege. They approved legislation making it easier for people previously unqualified able to purchase a house. Meanwhile, corporations were left unsupervised and raked in the cash on the unwitting buyers.

It's a Tool, not a Toy

On an early summer morning in July 2007 I pulled up to the hotel to pick up my client. We were scheduled to drive several markets in the Nashville MSA. I had gone through the exercise before with my client, but this time was different because this site tour was the first time the vice president and director of real estate were along foe the ride.

The term make or break comes to mind as several sites were going to get a thumbs up or down based on the tour.

As we got into my vehicle and settled in, the VP flipped open his lap top and wedged in the adapter into the cigarette lighter. He grabbed a funny looking device, plugged it into his USB port and then took the end of the device and attached it to the windshield with a suction cup.

As I quickly learned, the VP was somewhat of a technology aficionado.

Once plugged in, he opened a program called Streets and Trips with GPS locator. I had never seen such a cool thing.

With this program you could take notes in the field and know your exact location.

"That's a cool toy," I said, trying to break the ice.

"Its a tool. Not a toy," he said plainly.

I stammered a bit before recovering. I wouldn't call that a great success at breaking the ice, but as the day went on the conversation flowed.

Looking back, I laugh at it now. But it's true. In real estate, one man's toy is another man's tool.

When Steve Jobs unveiled the Apple Ipad earlier this year, I was dying to get it. For the first time, technology had delivered what I had been wanting for years - a fully portable, electronic leasing portfolio capable of emailing flyers with a touch of a button and zoom in on aerials or whiz through photos of a site with potential clients.

Of course when my wife heard about my new found obsession, she replied, "it's a toy. Not a tool."

It took a few months, but she finally caved in and indulged my inward technology geek and we bought the Ipad.

While I use it for work, yeah, I'm also guilty of writing this blog post on it too. So, I guess it's a little bit of both. A toy and a tool. Time will tell which one it is the most, but my money is on it being a tool.

Stuff I'm Going to Do

During one of the several days we were snowed in during the winter this year, my wife and I settled into each other's arms on the couch in our living room and started the Pixar movie UP!

A few minutes into the movie there's a wonderful montage that got both of us to unexpectedly tear up. Take a look:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GroDErHIM_0&feature=related

The wife kept a scrapbook titled Stuff I'm Going to Do. What was so wonderful was they enjoyed all the different stages of life together.

Unfortunately, one of the pair left leaving the other alone. But that's where the adventure began for the main character of the movie.

One of Claudia's girl friends from Barcelona, Spain just wrapped up a three week trip to the United States. It was her chance to do a little soul searching after life threw her a curve ball. She wanted to find herself again and we think she may have done that on the trip, or if not, then she's a little more at peace with herself.

What everyone should remember is to not get caught up in the things we are going to do, but enjoy the moments life gives us each day as best we can. Plan the future but don't define your happiness based on how you expect things to turn out because Life's going to throw some curve balls your way. It's just a matter of time.

So go watch this movie if you've not already. And if you cry a little, that's okay too.

Sawyer Brown Road

 Fran's Flag in River Plantation

Nashville suffered a historical flood that devastated expansive portions of the city between May 1 - 2. When two days of nearly solid rain was over, nearly 14 inches of water had been dumped onto Music City - that's more than a 1,000 year flood event. In west Nashville the Harpeth River swelled outside its banks and for nearly two days swallowed entire neighborhoods.

It's hard to comprehend the devastation even a week after waters have receded. In Bellevue, one of the hardest hit areas, the suffering and loss is obvious. Along Sawyer Brown Road, a north/south artery that connects Highway 70 with Old Harding Road and bisects River Plantation the materialistic representation of people's lives is discarded in piles waiting to be picked up and moved to landfills.

Doors. TVs. Cabinets. Photos. Archery targets. Sofas. Heirlooms. Dolls. Toys. Cars. Bicycles. Swimming pool floats.

The road is dusted white by pulverized dry wall. Construction material including cabinets, framing, doors and insulation that's been ripped out of homes is piled higher than the flooded cars that still haven't been moved.

The first weekend following the flood, volunteers sweat and bled demolishing houses in River Plantation while physically and emotionally exhausted home owners looked on and supervised. A couple miles away Nashville socialites gathered for the annual equestrian Steeplechase. After the races, some spectators of the races drove to Sawyer Brown to see first hand the reason they brought a sack full of canned food to the races.

Inside River Plantation alleyways and green spaces were quickly filled with debris. Hundreds of volunteers and home owners began gutting out the homes and getting rid of everything.

Fran, 84, had lived in River Plantation since the 1980s. Her son Rick had flown from Connecticut to help.

"Its hard to see. Some things she's had since I was born are just lying there in that pile.".Rick said. "When I turned down George Patton, I didn't recognize it. I had to double check to make sure it was the right street."

In Fran's carport an American flag lay against a pile of salvageable items. Soon it was waving in the breeze of the alleyway as a sign of hope, patriotism and a testament of the human spirit to not let hope and optimism be destroyed by the flood.

Volunteers traveled in droves to help. Service International, a disaster relief organization, drove from St. Louis to help organize volunteer groups. Unemployed workers from Kingston Springs volunteered during the week. Nissan's corporate headquarters gave its employees four days paid to volunteer. Employees of St. Jude's Children's Hospital in Memphis volunteered their time. Many are shocked by the scale of devastation.

"It's awful," said Mark Sullivan, a Bellevue resident whose home wasn't flooded but felt compelled to help his community. But "I think we'll look back and be proud to be Nashvillians because we are handling it."

Persistence in 2010

I was sitting in our living room on Tuesday evening reading a book. After a few moments, I noticed my Cocker Spaniel Missy was eyeing my lap and begging for permission to jump up and be petted. As soon as my Pomeranian Pebbles realized Missy was getting attention, albeit not very much, she quickly ran to my feet.

While Missy cried softly as if saying, "Please, oh, please say it's okay to lie down on your lap," Pebbles was peeking over the chair on one side. Then she disappeared and suddenly jumped onto the chair. Clawing at the edge, she gradually fell back to the floor unable to quite pull herself up into my lap.

Did I give her a signal it was okay to jump into my lap? No. Did I help her? No. I just watched.

Plan B. Pebbles saw my legs were blocking her way, but there was a hole of opportunity! She planned her approach and jumped. Hanging to the edge, she clawed trying to pull herself over the edge but fell to the floor. No success.

Plan C. That's right. A third attempt. She went to the other side of the chair, took a few steps to get into position and leaped into my lap, crawled over the book I was reading and began pawing at my chest for attention. She squarely planted her face between my book and face and didn't care. Instead, she demanded attention.

Meanwhile, Missy was still on the floor softly crying and waiting for the opportunity she didn't realize had already been missed.

Pebbles' persistence made me think about how difficult the first two months have been during 2010. After busting all of 2009, I was hoping this year things would begin to improve. I've been discouraged and frustrated that the improvement hasn't begun yet.

Pebbles reminded me, and hopefully you, not to give up or wait for someone to help. Success or failure is entirely on your shoulders! Go out there and make your own success! Don't give up! Tackle challenges using different approaches. If you keep trying then you might find yourself achieving your goals. For me, that will be a fully leased shopping center or two! For Pebbles, it was laying in my lap. What is it for you?

Lost & Found: Wedding Ring

My head plunged below the water unexpectedly and only after I managed to scramble back into my kayak did I realize my wedding ring was missing.

Within a matter of seconds, I had lost the symbol of my eternal love and commitment for my wife.

It was July 2009 when I went on that ill-fated trip down the Buffalo River with my brother and cousins during our annual family reunion. When I noticed my wedding ring was missing, I could feel a knot in my stomach. "What will Claudia think," went through my mind.

At first I didn't believe it was that big a deal. But as I floated down the river thinking about what I had lost, the significance of the loss slowly began to hit me. That gold band had traveled from Colombia via one of Claudia's best friends to the United States for our wedding. It was intended to be a constant reminder of our marriage. Often I had rubbed my fingers across the band while in conversation; reflecting on my wife while listening to the words of others wash over my ears.

It was gone somewhere underneath the Buffalo.

Thankfully, my wife didn't make a major deal out of the news. I didn't need to sleep in the proverbial dog house. She was surprisingly okay with the news.

It probably didn't hurt that I had a "back-up" ring I had purchased during a college trip to Venezuela. I wear that ring now. It's not white gold, but instead the traditional yellow gold. It's not my favorite ring and doesn't carry the abstract significance of the wedding ring. I'll never be able to recapture that significance again unfortunately. There was only one ring given to me on my wedding day.

Have you ever lost anything irreplaceable? It's wasn't a fun experience for me.

But saying good-bye to something that can never be returned seems to increase the significance of the item once it's lost.

Maybe that is how God sees us. Maybe, we're the most valuable thing in his eyes while we are lost. Maybe he wants us more because we are lost. The good news is unlike my ring sitting somewhere on the bottom of the Buffalo River, we don't have to be lost forever.